Midnight Wanders

Straight to the point, I'm in a moment of not knowing what I should do with my life. I'm in a point where I just think that everything I want would not be achieved and having everybody around me thinks that I do nothing just makes it worst. I know other people opinion doesn't matter, but I'm not in a good place right now and everything just seems wrong. I'm jealous with other people who seem to reach their dreams without even trying that hard, I'm jealous of people who just seem like they have smooth ways on getting where they are.  I'm jealous but I don't hate them, I hate my self. I hate my stupid brain of not knowing what to do. Looking around, everyone just know what they want to do, they decided to do it and they get what they want. I damned my self, I damned my life, I damned my fate, I damned my indecisiveness, I damned my skill, I damned my thoughts, I damned everything. Well, to be not that ungrateful, I do feel His blessings on me alri...

Abis di tag video orang prewed sama si oneng, terus lagunya enak banget, sendu-sendu romantis, eh gue langsung baper. Abang lagi sibuk, lagi UAS ceunah, telponan jarang-jarang, telponan juga kasian liat mukanya stress. Semangat ya, Bang, bersusah-susah dahulu bersenang-senang kemudian. Sebelom lanjut baca setel dulu videonya buat jadi background music . Mellow nya juga bukan cuma karena pasangan aja sih, tapi hidup secara general juga bikin mellow . Di saat perasaan telat dalam hidup. Telat menemukan apa yang gue mau, telat mengejar apa yang gue mau, telat mendapatkan apa yang gue mau. Lingkungan semua mendukung banget tapi kalo lagi ngebandingin diri sama yang udah mulai duluan jadi sedih gitu, kayanya ketinggalannya jauh banget. Sedih sih, tapi kalo diem doang juga ga akan membawa gue kemana-mana. Harus usaha semaksimal mungkin melakukan apa yang bisa dilakukan. Pernah baca, cobaan usaha sendiri itu ada di 3 tahun pertama. Gue harus sabar dan gigih menjalani susah senang...