Whose here never procrastinate? Come on, who doesn't? All you lazy asses in front of your laptop or lying down on your comfortable bed scrolling through 9gag. I know you. Well to be fair, I do it too. On a regular basis. I guess every student knows how it feels to procrastinate. When its time to do your homework, suddenly everything else looks very very much more interesting than writing down the answer of 2+2, or maybe for art students, peeling an orange looks very much more important than drawing a perfect circle on an art paper. Well for me, when I was in the middle of my thesis, suddenly I get a clean bathroom, perfectly made bed top, shiny floor, and a new recipe to brag about all while I have nothing to add to my long abandoned chapter 2. We've all been through that, or maybe we are in the procrastination mode right now. I am. Now this is somewhat I feel important to share about procrastination. How to make it as a helper to get things done. Why is procrastinatio...
Jadi kemaren itu gue lagi ngobrol-ngobrol sama si mantan gebetan, gue lagi cerita-cerita aja kalo dulu gue takut banget kalo sampe punya pasangan yang pribumi dan non-cina. Soalnya, adek bokap dan adek nyokap yang cewe, 2-2nya dapet pasangannya yang pribumi. Eh sekarang gue malah sayang banget si mas-mas jawa sunda ini. Terus dia juga cerita, dia sempet benci banget sama orang cina karna ada 1 masalah. Gak gede-gede banget tapi emang ngeselin, jadilah dia benci sama orang-orang cokin. Eh, malah dapetnya yang cina! Haha Pas udah kelar cerita terjadilah percakapan sebagai berikut, Gue: "Karma kali ya aku, dulu benci banget, eh sekarang malah gamau sama cina, maunya sama pribumi.." Dia: "Jadi sekarang kamu lagi kena karma?" Gw: "Iya kayanya, lagi kena karma nih aku." Dia: "Oh karma, kalo aku mah anugrah.." HAP! Kicep gue langsung, entah mengapa di kalimat terakhir itu gue merasa tertohok sekaligus terpuji. Tapi yang pasti l...
I've kind of overcoming my insecurities of being afraid to be judged, about being nervous on talking to people, on being afraid to have friends. I kind of being good at not giving a crap and suddenly things got better. But as every major point of my life, when something feel like its going up hill, I should get ready for the heavy down fall that will follow. Usualy the down fall would just be me crying to my boyfriend and tell him how I feel worthless. But this time I'm afraid I will have some emptiness. I can feel it waiting for me right around the corner. After every social event or even small social interaction I'm feeling something's missing. I didn't left any of my things behind yet I feel something is missing. I'm afraid to fill that emptiness I might do something crazy. Something inhumane. Something merciless. I'm getting so afraid because my brain starts to think that it's something I can be okay with. I don't know. Maybe I just need...
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